How My Husband Told Me He Was Joining The Navy

 SAMSUNG CAMERA PICTURES Processed with VSCO with hb2 preset

I can’t help but smile when I think back to when my husband first told me he was interested in joining the US Navy.

About 5 years ago, we were both college students back in the Philippines. We went on a few dates together, met a few friends in each other’s circles, and were just starting to get used to each other's company.

Trust me, when I say that this was super early on into our relationship. For the record, we weren’t even exclusive, when I found about him wanting to join the Navy.

Anyway, we were in his car, and at one of my university’s parking lots. My car was parked right beside his and the sun was on its way down. All that was left for me to do was open the door, say goodbye, and drive home. Yet somehow, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. There was an air of awkwardness in the air and because I have an uncanny need to know what’s going on in a person’s mind, I asked him.

“What was that thing your friend said earlier? About the Navy.”

Dead silence.

Let me tell you right now that I had to brace myself for what was coming next because let’s be honest, silence usually never means well in serious conversations.

“I’ll enlist in the Navy. It’s what I’ve always wanted to do.”

When he finally spoke, I didn’t know how to react because (1) we had just started dating and I didn't know him too well yet to be sad anyway (hahaha!) and (2) I knew what I was going to say next.

“So this (us) has an expiration date then?”

I told him about how I had plans of leaving the country after 1-2 years of post-grad life, about how I wanted to get settled in Singapore because it reminded me of home, and how I didn’t want to be confined to one place.

“I mean, I guess we can just see how things go? We still have a year in the same country anyway.”

“Okay.”

signedbyroxci roxci vergara happilyevergara.jpg

And that was how the conversation ended. It was so casual and not to mention, SO DIFFERENT from how I, a natural born planner, would prefer. On one end, I felt relieved that the conversation was over and that we both relatively had clear plans and futures ahead of us career-wise. On the other hand, I knew there would come a time when we would have to say goodbye -- and that it would probably hurt a ton.

Most of my friends know I’m pretty careful with my decisions. I avoid confrontation at all costs and would ghost out of dates if they seemed a little too serious. I wanted to work on my career first. My theory was happy endings and fairy tales could wait as long as I was successful in my line of work. So the fact that I said “okay” to something that could potentially hurt me big time in the future was the only thing I could think about on the car ride home.

It felt weird. A part of me was asking myself how I could’ve been so casual about the entire thing. Another part of me was saying, “Roxci, what in the world did you get yourself into now?” And yet another part of me said, “Hey, you finally learned to just go with the flow.”

Fast forward to present time, we’ve celebrated 2 weddings, one civil and one Church with 2 years in between. We’ve traveled to over 12 countries together, places in Asia, America, and Europe. And now we’re still in the process of PCS-ing to our next duty station within the next few months.

Sometimes I find life incredibly insane at times. Like everything is happening a little too fast that it’s so hard to just take a step back and think about all the choices that have led me to where I am. Most of the time, I still have to remind myself that each choice I’ve actively made and each reaction to a situation has brought me places beyond what I could’ve imagined.

I mean, sure, my initial plan post-university is nowhere near where I am now. But that doesn’t mean I’m any less happy. In fact, I think I like the view from where I stand much better.

____

Btw if you were ever curious as to how life in a military ship is, press play on the video below. Before we left Spain, we were lucky enough to experience a day out at sea aboard the USS Porter.